Christalignment Bethel Fortune-Telling New Age Naked with Jesus Extravaganza!

Last year we made a big deal about the Australian organization called “Christalignment” and its pagan practices covered in a sugary Christian coating. Well, there’s more.

Thanks to the Encounter Gospel of Christalignment, one lady had an encounter where “Jesus” petted her while she was completely naked. Here’s the latest Fighting for the Faith video on this topic.

Christalignment is a very small group that was briefly scolded by Bethel Super Apostle, Kris Vallotton, who thought the idea of “Christian tarot cards” was “insane” and whoever was doing this needed to “repent and stop the craziness…”

Kris Vallotton removed his post the next day and did a 180 degree flip flop-he endorsed his new Christalignment friends, while he also attempted to blame the “fake news media” for creating the problem (you know, his post on his Facebook page). Read about the whole story here: Kris Vallotton RUNS From His Own Facebook Post!!

Bethel Church is one of the biggest, most influential churches in the world, and they support the New Age Fortune-Telling “ministry” of Christalignment 100%.

Here’s a post where Christalignment is welcoming the “lovely Bethel crew:”

The Bethel team “rocked it” at the Christalignment booth:

Jenny Hodge is the mother of Bethel missionary, Ben Fitzgerald.

Fitzgerald is the director of Awakening Australia, which had Christalignment as a supporting ministry (and Bill Johnson as a featured speaker).

Here are some photos from the Hodge’s Facebook account to show people the ministry work of Christalignment:

Here’s a promotional video where a Christalignment worker explains what services they offer:

To hear a very detailed (and disturbing!) interview with Jenn Hodges, check out this recent podcast:

The Christalignment team is convinced that their sort of “undercover” approach to ministry is the only way to reach the non-Christian world. While it is a great goal to reach unbelievers with the Gospel message of Jesus Christ, it does not do any good if they never hear the Gospel message of Jesus Christ. The foundational message of Jesus dying for the redemption of guilty sinners seems to be completely missing from the Christalignment “gospel.” In video after video, people who have an “encounter” in a “Destiny Reading” are always “at peace with who they are,” or they “feel encouraged to continue on the path they’re on.” What is the point of reaching people just so they can continue believing the same thing they believed all along?

We encourage everyone to go out and preach the Gospel, but it only matters if it really is the Gospel.

“God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”

— Romans 5:8

“For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him.”

— John 3:16-17

“He himself bore our sins in his body on the tree, that we might die to sin and live to righteousness. By his wounds you have been healed. For you were straying like sheep, but have now returned to the Shepherd and Overseer of your souls.”

— 1 Peter 2:24-25

“For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified by his grace as a gift, through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus, whom God put forward as a propitiation by his blood, to be received by faith. This was to show God’s righteousness, because in his divine forbearance he had passed over former sins.”

— Romans 3:23-25

“For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures.”

— 1 Corinthians 15:3-4

Here are some more articles on this important topic:

Kris Vallotton and Bethel Cannot Escape Link to New Age Occultism

Topless Dancing at Christalignment "Workshop"-Does Kris Vallotton Approve?

10 Reasons Why You Should RUN AWAY From Bethel Redding

Bethel Church Tells Witch that She's "On the Right Path" and "God is So Proud of Her!"

Cindy Jacobs Explains Her Psychic Ability as "Spiritual Reading"

The Hypnotic Worship "Encounter Gospel" of Bethel & the NAR Explained

Sarah Young's "Jesus Always" Wins Book Award -Thanks to God Himself!

HarperCollins is a gigantic book publishing company that owns both Thomas Nelson and Zondervan, the two largest Christian book publishers in the world. Sarah Young has heard directly from Jesus (again) and has written down His words and created another best-selling devotional book. Her previous book, "Jesus Calling" has sold over 25 million copies, but it was getting a bit old. Fortunately for Young, Jesus decided to speak once again and after just a short time on the market, this new book has reached "Platinum" level of sales! Since this book was written directly by God, it shouldn't surprise anyone that it won the ECPA Book of the Year. (ECPA stands for: Evangelical Confused Publishing Association)

HarperCollins Christian Publishing Wins Four 2018 Christian Book Awards including Jesus Always named Book of the Year

Of course, this isn't really fair to all of the other books that, let's face it, were NOT written by God Himself. Still, we have to give credit where credit is due: If God writes a book, it's gotta be a good one!

HarperCollins has not made it clear whether they plan on publishing old-fashioned Bibles anymore, as this new venture seems to be much more popular with the book-buying public.

Lest anyone think that these awards have no scholarly merit, remember that in 2015 the Book of the Year award went to Rick Warren's dieting book "The Daniel Plan: 40 Days to a Healthier Life." Here's a current photo of Rick Warren to show how effective that book was:

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Seriously, here's a bunch of information about this issue from Marcia Montenegro.

Jenn Johnson Got More Cute By Believing What God Said About Her

Because our words can change stuff...

This is from the same speech where: The Lord Grabbed Jenn Johnson by the Hair and Sent Her Into Outer Space

Kris Vallotton RUNS From His Own Facebook Post!!

Kris Vallotton is trying to deceive the very people who should know better-the people who read what he says on his Facebook page! Within a 24 hour period he completely contradicted himself, without any explanation. He now fully endorses the use of "Destiny Cards" to help people to "have an encounter with God." The Christalignment Ministry page has also changed the description of their practices to hide the disturbing similarity to tarot card reading.

Yesterday, he harshly criticized (without naming them) Ken and Jenny Hodge for using "Christian Tarot Cards," and he spoke as if these nameless people were not really connected to Bethel Church at all.  Here's a screenshot of his post from yesterday that he erased later in the same day:

Today he calls them "amazing people" being "destroyed by fake news." 

Here's what Vallotton posted this morning:

What?? Vallotton himself is the one who was very critical of these people just 24 hours ago! 

Kris Vallotton IS the fake news! 

I (Steven Kozar) was able to briefly comment on Vallotton's Facebook page, and then he blocked me from commenting:

Kris Vallotton is shamelessly manipulating his followers, just like Michael Brown. Vallotton is essentially saying to his gullible followers: "I know that I wrote a very public statement just yesterday condemning the practices of Ken and Jenny Hodge's Christalignment Ministry and then I got all sorts of negative feedback from you people, and then I deleted the whole debate from my wall... but today I want us all to pretend it never happened, so I can now appear to be supportive of their ministry. Okay?" Vallotton's gullible followers seem to be saying "Okay Kris, we will believe anything you tell us."

 Here's the entire article from yesterday: Kris Vallotton and Bethel Cannot Escape Link to New Age Occultism

Here's a new (and disturbing) development as of January 5, 2018: Topless Dancing at Christalignment "Workshop"-Does Kris Vallotton Approve?

Here's another important follow-up article from NAR expert Holly Pivec at Spirit of Error: The "Christian" Tarot Card Controversy at Bethel

More articles on this and other related topics:

Another Bethel pastor defends the occult practices of Jen Hodge and Christalignment.

Bethel pastor has a FITzgerald about his mother’s occultism being exposed.

Kris Vallotton: "Wealth is the Magnetic Attraction to Prosperity"

Bethel endorsing occultists in ‘sheep’s clothing’ – insight given by an insider from Christalignment.

Kris Vallotton Inspired by Sylvester Stallone’s Survival by Doing a Porn Movie

Kris Vallotton: Prosperity Preacher Exchanging Love for Wealth

Here's something that false teachers hope you never see: Shocking Stuff you're Not Supposed to Know!

If you want to see how Kris Vallotton is a horrendous Bible twister, listen to this episode of Fighting for the Faith.

Here's a TON of articles all in one place: The Bill Johnson Cornucopia of False Teaching

Titus 1:7-11  “For the overseer must be above reproach as God's steward, not self-willed, not quick-tempered, not addicted to wine, not pugnacious, not fond of sordid gain, but hospitable, loving what is good, sensible, just, devout, self-controlled, holding fast the faithful word which is in accordance with the teaching, so that he will be able both to exhort in sound doctrine and to REFUTE THOSE WHO CONTRADICT. For there are many rebellious men, empty talkers and deceivers, especially those of the circumcision, who must be silenced because they are upsetting whole families, teaching things they should not teach for the sake of sordid gain.”

James 3: 1 "Not many of you should become teachers, my brothers, for you know that we who teach will be judged with greater strictness." 

Titus 2:1 “But as for you, speak the things which are fitting for sound doctrine.”

Galatians 1:6-9  “I am amazed that you are so quickly deserting Him who called you by the grace of Christ, for a different gospel; which is really not another; only there are some who are disturbing you and want to distort the gospel of Christ. But even if we, or an angel from heaven, should preach to you a gospel contrary to what we have preached to you, he is to be accursed! As we have said before, so I say again now, if any man is preaching to you a gospel contrary to what you received, he is to be accursed!”

Kris Vallotton and Bethel Cannot Escape Link to New Age Occultism

Kris Vallotton and Bill Johnson are in a quagmire of New Age Occultism of their own making, but no matter how many posts they erase, or how much they tell their own cover stories, the truth is that they don't teach biblical Christianity and it's (hopefully) starting to become more obvious.

At Bethel Church you find these things:

• The strange "Latter Rain" and "New Breed" false doctrine leftover from creepy cult-leader William Branham

• The prosperity gospel heresy of Benny Hinn, and many others (including disgusting blog posts from Kris Vallotton, like this)

• A witch who gets positive and affirming "prophetic words" from Bethel "prophets" who tell her to continue her witchcraft

• Bill Johnson, Kris Vallotton, and other Bethel staff contributed to a book that openly encourages Christians to "take back truths" from the New Age to become more effective Christians

The Bethel "gospel" is has nothing to do with sinners repenting of their sin and believing in the atoning sacrifice of Christ to pay for their sins; the Bethel "gospel" is largely focused on telling people how wonderful and loved they are, and helping them to discover their "Destiny."   

Bill Johnson and Kris Vallotton are famous for creating a whole new type of church, where they are known as new Apostles who get direct words from God to guide Christians "off the map" of orthodox, biblical Christianity, which they continually deride as old-fashioned, ineffective and "religious."

In short, nobody goes to Bethel (or their "School of Supernatural Ministry") to learn "traditional" Christianity because they teach that we're in a new era where everyone can hear directly from God (outside of the Bible) and where there are no rules about how to do anything anymore. The "spirit leads us" now. Bethel tells people to experiment and make lots of mistakes until they finally figure out how to "prophecy" or heal people or whatever.

So now a group in Australia called "Christalignment" which has been following the Bethel methods to a tee, is getting thrown under the bus of Kris Vallotton, Bill Johnson & Company. This couple, Ken and Jenny Hodge, are the founders of Christalignment:

These people are committed to fitting in with hippy/New Age types, so they dress the part and try to be relatable to that crowd. The people of Christalignment give "readings" using their own specially painted "prophetic" cards so that people can learn about their "destiny" or receive some supernatural information about themselves. Does this sound like a physic reading using tarot cards? Yes, of course it does, that's the whole idea! These people are slipping into all sorts of New Age events in order to reach the non-Christian world with what they sincerely believe is the Gospel. That's what they say and believe. This article will not deal with the question of whether these are good things for Christians to be doing; that's for another day.

These are probably incredibly devoted and caring people who have the best of intentions. Here are some testimonials from their website:

What Our Clients Say About Us

"Wow... I think I read your Dream interpretation 5 times, put it down, pondered on it and re-read it. That is so spot on as to how my life has been. I cannot express to you just how much I am ministered to right now. So many years of waiting for an interpretation.... and it ministers to me more in my season now than had I gotten it earlier. I am writing this with big fat tears of much gratitude rolling down my cheeks right now. Thank you." -Michele

"So true, big shift happened. Life is amazing. Thanks for your guidance. Will let you know when I remember my next dream." -Bianca

"I attended the MBS festival in Sydney yesterday and had a fantastic reading with one of your readers (the lady with the purple hair)." -Greta

"I wish to thank the people at Dandenong market this morning. You have changed my health and mindset. Again.... Thank you." -Tracey

"I met you today at Mornington, Jenny, and wanted to tell you how much more relaxed and positive I feel. Thank you so very much." -Heather

"Thank you so much to the guy & gals at Dandy market today, sorry forgot your names; was just what I needed today - some confirmations & healing as well, so many trials & tribulations have been happening. Thanks again for understanding." -Maria

"Today I went to the Mind Body Spirit festival in the city. Wow, I was blown away by how accurate a reading I had done by a lovely lady named Ally from Christalignment." -Heidi

"Very impressed by Christalignment insights from Spirit at Dandenong market which gave me answers to my questions. Authority, peace, transition, transformation to the Third Heaven. Bliss."-Anne

"I went two times to Christalignment, both being very beneficial to me. I always believed in a higher power and intuitive souls, earth angels. Chau and the team helped me get some direction to where I am in life and some deep relief from a long 5 years of depression. I felt calm and accepted by this lovely group of souls. Thank you guys." -Erin

Notice that these testimonials have nothing to do with the Gospel of Jesus Christ. But they seem to be really effective at making people feel some kind of genuine spiritual experience. So what does this have to do with Kris Vallotton and Bethel? Well, today he reacted to this article from Pulpit and Pen (that made the practices of Christalignment more widely known) and he spoke against the apparent "Christian tarot card" reading. Notice how Vallotton speaks as if these are people he knows nothing about:

Kris Vallotton tries his best to distance himself by claiming no responsibility for the practices of Christalignment, but he quickly discovered that he couldn't brush this off. Bethel is just too closely associated with Christalignment and people started confronting him on his Facebook wall, including Ken and Jenny Hodge, who claim to be the parents of Ben Fitzgerald, a pastor/missionary from Bethel!

Other people wrote on Vallotton's wall in support of the Hodge's "Christalignment" methods, and Vallotton wrote almost nothing at all:

What did you expect, Kris Vallotton?? This is the fruit of Bethel's vague, feel-good, do whatever you think the spirit is telling you to do philosophy! Bill Johnson wrote that we should "take back truths" from the New Age; isn't that exactly what Christalignment is doing? Vallotton, Johnson and all the Bethel pastors teach that the unbelievers need to have an "encounter with God" (not hear crusty old Bible passages) and isn't Christalignment doing that very thing? They believe they have discovered an innovative new way to help people "experience God."

Christalignment and Bethel Church teach the same things! Here's a story written by a student of Bethel's "School of Supernatural Ministry" where students are encouraged to operate undercover at New Age/Psychic  fairs: Are You More Religious Than Jesus?

Here's a screenshot of the article:

Global Awakening, which was founded by Randy Clark (a very close friend of Bill Johnson and Bethel) produced a movie called Witch City that features their students doing exactly the same thing as Christalignment:

Is Kris Vallotton going to write a Facebook post condemning Randy Clark's "psychic readers?" Nope. Randy Clark and Bill Johnson are teaching together at Bethel next month. For $139 you can listen to these supernatural experts, too. 

So what does Vallotton eventually do? He deletes his entire post along with all the critical comments from Bethel supporters. This is how Super Pastors operate nowadays (just ask Michael Brown).

For much more detail on this breaking story, please check out these articles from ChurchWatch Central:

Bethelgate – looking under the rug of Bethel administration.

Hodge connects ChristAlignment to Bethel; Bethel retracts statement.

 

UPDATE TO THIS STORY!!

Not only has Kris Vallotton changed his story, the Christalignment Ministry website is erasing its tarot card language: The "Christian" Tarot Card Controversy at Bethel Redding

Kris Vallotton RUNS From His Own Facebook Post!!

Here's something that false teachers hope you never see: Shocking Stuff you're Not Supposed to Know!

If you want to see how Kris Vallotton is a horrendous Bible twister, listen to this episode of Fighting for the Faith.

For $79 You Can Learn "Prophetic Tattoo & Piercing Interpretation!"

Hey boys and girls, here's a great idea: "Take your prophetic ministry to the next level—discover how you can give powerful prophetic words to people through their tattoos and piercings!"

Here's a link to Doug Addison's online store where you can buy his course:

Doug Addison's Prophetic Tattoo and Piercing Interpretation Class

In this course you will discover:

• Why people get tattoos
• Tattoos in the Bible
• Common tattoo designs and their meanings
• How to recognize symbolic messages in tattoos
• The significance of tattoo and piercing placement
• How negative designs can have positive meanings
• How to develop metaphoric thinking
• Plus, much more

Here's how Doug Addison describes himself:

"Doug Addison is a prophetic speaker, author and coach. Over the past twenty years, he has been a cutting-edge prophetic leader, dream interpreter, entrepreneur, life coach, consultant and trainer. He is also a leading authority in the area of destiny achievement to educational institutions, professional associations and religious organizations." 

And believe it or not, Addison is STILL trying to sell these worthless books:

We are not sure if Doug Addison really is a "cutting-edge prophetic leader, dream interpreter, life coach, consultant and trainer," but he most certainly is an "entrepreneur!"

Shawn Bolz Moves Goal Posts in Word of Knowledge says Close is Accurate Enough

Shawn Bolz moved the goal posts in a recent word of knowledge video, as he proclaimed that being close is apparently accurate enough.

He starts out clearly calling Terra out by her age of 50. This is clearly about age to him. He finds out that Terra is 51. At that point he declares 50 as close enough, then he moves the goal posts and says the reference to 50 was about a supposed year of jubilee coming Terra’s way.

The biblical standard for a word from God is 100% accuracy. Regardless, the 100% moving of the goal posts from age to year of jubilee exposes Bolz for being a complete fraud.

“An appalling and horrible thing has happened in the land: the prophets prophesy falsely, and the priests rule at their direction; my people love to have it so, but what will you do when the end comes?”

— Jeremiah 5: 30-31

“And her prophets have smeared whitewash for them, seeing false visions and divining lies for them, saying, ‘Thus says the Lord God,’ when the Lord has not spoken.”

— Ezekiel 22: 28

“Your prophets have seen for you false and deceptive visions; they have not exposed your iniquity
to restore your fortunes, but have seen for you oracles that are false and misleading.”

— Lamentations 2: 14

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Holy Spirit Uses Smart Phone to Help Shawn Bolz Do Cold Readings

Shack Author Shares His New Age Mystical Side

Here's a conference where only three people will be speaking (one of them is William Paul Young):

Trinity: The Soul of Creation

Here's a description of what they'll be talking about from their home page:

"Belief in a Trinitarian God is not primarily a Christian theological revelation as much as it is a metaphor for the nature of reality, both seen and unseen.

We find the pattern of dynamic relationship in the very structure of the atom, in our families, in ecosystems and economies. It is a pattern of mutual giving and receiving: in a word, Love. If Trinity is the model for Creation (Genesis 1:26-27), then it is a relational, benevolent universe.

Rohr, Bourgeault, and Young believe the Trinity—fully experienced and enjoyed—has the capacity to change everything. We already participate within this dance whether we realize it or not. But when we consciously engage in loving communion, we open ourselves to being transformed at the deepest levels.

We hope you leave with an entirely different way of knowing yourself and the world. Our teachers offer not mere information but wisdom that has implications for theology, psychology, science, and politics."

Does this sound like Christianity or some kind of New Age Mysticism? Here's a description of the speakers:

"Richard Rohr is a Franciscan priest of the New Mexico Province. He is the founder of the Center for Action and Contemplation and academic dean of the CAC’s Living School in Albuquerque, New Mexico. An internationally recognized author and spiritual leader, Fr. Richard teaches primarily on incarnational mysticism, non-dual consciousness, and contemplation, with a particular emphasis on how these affect the social justice issues of our time."

"Cynthia Bourgeault is a modern day mystic, Episcopal priest, writer, and internationally recognized retreat leader. Cynthia divides her time between solitude at her seaside hermitage in Maine and traveling globally to teach the Christian contemplative and Wisdom path. A long-time advocate of Centering Prayer, Cynthia has worked closely with Thomas Keating and Bruno Barnhart."

Here's how William Paul Young is described:

"Wm Paul Young is author of the best-selling novel, The Shack. In this innovative, yet true-to-Scripture exploration of Trinity, Paul wrestles with the timeless question, “Where is God in a world of suffering and pain?” Paul has “the imagination of a writer and the passion of a theologian,” as Eugene Peterson says. His recent work of fiction, Eve, offers breathtaking discoveries that challenge traditional beliefs about who we are and how we’re made, helping us see each other as our Creator does—complete, unique, and not constrained by cultural rules or limitations."

These are certainly very nice people who sincerely believe what they believe, but it's obvious that they are not having a Christian conference; this is a complete departure from Biblical Christianity. Yet, Young's book The Shack, and it's companion movie is considered "must-see" and "must-read" by many Evangelical Christians. 

Here's more information about The Shack:

Shack Ebola Virus Outbreak 2 (Fighting for the Faith with more links)

Podcast: Marcia Montenegro Talks with Steve About the Shack (Messed Up Church Podcast with more links)

The Shack Movie Review by Pastor Ted Giese

What Does The Shack Really Teach? “Lies We Believe About God” Tells Us by Tim Challies

Galatians 1:6-9  “I am amazed that you are so quickly deserting Him who called you by the grace of Christ, for a different gospel; which is really not another; only there are some who are disturbing you and want to distort the gospel of Christ. But even if we, or an angel from heaven, should preach to you a gospel contrary to what we have preached to you, he is to be accursed! As we have said before, so I say again now, if any man is preaching to you a gospel contrary to what you received, he is to be accursed!”

Shocking Stuff You're Not Supposed to Know!

If you had Milky-Paps: The Creepy Tragedy of John Crowder

John Crowder is a tragedy of sorts. He appears to understand the work Jesus accomplished on the cross for us. At various times he explains it well. Yet this is all tainted by a high level of creepiness. I’m convinced it’s from influences in the Land of Charismania.

In this video called “Jesus the Suckling”, he asks the viewer, “If you had a set of milky-paps would you let little baby Jesus drink from your breasts?” (Around 12:55.)

That’s just creepy and strange to suggest. But it doesn’t end there. In a video about heresy hunters he set the Youtube video thumbnail to a photo of himself shirtless in an obvious attempt to invite controversy. But Crowder is a master of inviting controversy...

It’s not just his videos, some of his books are creepy too. He has a book titled, “The Ecstasy of Loving God: Trances, Raptures, and the Supernatural Pleasures of Jesus Christ”.

The book description on Amazon makes it sound like pleasurable out of body experiences are normal for all Christians.

“It is time to return the joy of the Lord to everyday Christian life. The Greek term for ecstasy is linked with the pleasurable, God-given state of out-of-body experience recorded throughout the New Testament and the church age.”

Reading the book description further, we can glimpse into the mystical charismania that lead to the tragedy that is John Crowder.

“Author John Crowder shows you how God’s active interaction with men and women throughout the ages has always been marked by supernatural experiences. More than a state of mind, you will see how the nature of God’s ecstasy is found in the joy, bliss, and inner raptures of His presence.

You will also:

* Learn the history of trances in revival ministries.

* Gain a biblical understanding of Christian mysticism.

* Explore the ecstatic states of prayer and spiritual trances.

* Learn how to walk in continual joy and pleasure before the Father.

* Examine miraculous phenomena.

* Be refreshed by the new wine of God’s Spirit!

* Be encouraged to drink from the river of His pleasure! (Psalm 36:8)

There is no doubt that you can experience the joy and ecstasy of His presence every day of your life”

It’s a distraction from the core message of the Gospel, and a distracting spiritual pivot taking his spiritual roots from the firm soil that is Jesus. There is nothing new under the sun. People have been trying to distract from Jesus since the first days of the church.

“Therefore let no one pass judgment on you in questions of food and drink, or with regard to a festival or a new moon or a Sabbath. These are a shadow of the things to come, but the substance belongs to Christ. Let no one disqualify you, insisting on asceticism and worship of angels, going on in detail about visions, puffed up without reason by his sensuous mind, and not holding fast to the Head, from whom the whole body, nourished and knit together through its joints and ligaments, grows with a growth that is from God.”

— Colossians 2: 16

The tragedies can be avoided by simply remaining rooted in Jesus and his word.

“And yet some people actually imagine that the revelation in God’s Word is not enough to meet our needs. They think that God from time to time carries on an actual conversation with them, chatting with them, satisfying their doubts, testifying to His love for them, promising them support and blessings. As a result, their emotions soar; they are full of bubbling joy that is mixed with self-confidence and a high opinion of themselves. The foundation for these feelings, however, does not lie within the Bible itself, but instead rests on the sudden creations of their imaginations. These people are clearly deluded. God’s Word is for all of us and each of us; He does not need to give particular messages to particular people.”

— Jonathan Edwards

Doug Addison Announces New Revelation from God-Sells Last Year's Prophecy at a Discount

"Doug Addison is a prophetic speaker, author, Life Coach and stand-up comedian" according to his online biography.

He also claims to have the inside track to God. This meme shows the level of Doug's extra-special superty-duperty knowledge. He is directing people to their own vain imaginations and to his website. He is NOT directing people to the true Word of God; instead, he is deliberately causing people to avoid it.

And for the truly desperate and deceived, there's this:

There's less than a month left in 2016 and Addison is still trying to make a few more bucks off of his utterly useless book of predictions for 2016. He's gotta clear off space on his shelves before he publishes the "2017 Book of Worthless Christian Fortune Telling." 

Instead of selling these idiotic books at a steep discount, why doesn't he tell everyone about all the stuff that came true since he published them 11 months ago?? He could sell a boatload of the 2017 Edition just by demonstrating all of the wonderful things that were accomplished since the 2016 Edition was published and sold. 

Doug Addison, what kind of God do you serve? You teach that this God is giving confusing and conflicting messages to his people, instead of the one and only Holy Bible that never changes. And we're supposed to believe that God gives special messages directly to you, and then you get to make money by charging people for it?? 

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Read more about this false teacher:

This "Prophet" Will Read Tattoo So People Can find Their Destiny

The Swiss Army Anointing-5 Signs You Might You May Have It

For those who think it's mean, judgmental and unloving to criticize Doug Addison (or any other popular teacher/prophet) here's something just for you: Shocking Stuff You're Not Supposed to Know.

If you're having a knee-jerk reaction to try and defend this kind of "prophetic" nonsense, check out: Confirmation Bias: Why You Are Protecting Your False Beliefs.

Finally, here's an article that will help you be more discerning and a lot less gullible: Defusing Demonic Dirty Bombs.

Patricia King Will Help Find You a Spouse! (for only $79.00)

Patricia King has a new teaching program for sale at XPMedia: Finding Your Mate.

(ScreenShot from Patricia King's Website)

Thought for the day: If you wanna send $79.00 to Patricia King so she can help you follow the mystical trail of breadcrumbs that will lead to your eventual marriage... well, we don't have a lot of hope for the success of your resulting marital relationship.

(This has been a Public Service Announcement from Pirate Christian Media)

"Prophetic Oopsies"-Real Prophets Can Say Sorry, Says "Prophetess" Vonda Brewer

“Prophetess” Vonda Brewer (The Nagging Prophetess) says real prophets can just say sorry and eat crow if they have a "prophetic oopsie." 

Here is a bit about her if you’re unfamiliar with Vonda: “Prophetess” Vonda Brewer is on record saying that God told her that Jeb Bush would win the Republican nomination for president in 2016. She claimed Trump would be trashed by the Republicans, and replaced with Jeb. As most of us know, Trump won the nomination, survived the convention, and he is now the official Republican nominee for president in 2016.

Vonda has decided to double down on her bet by saying the Republicans will dump Trump on September 10th, 2016 and put Jeb and George P. Bush on the ballot. Pay attention to two things in the video below. Around 1:57 while giving the date, she starts scratching her neck. Some body language experts assert that can be an indicator someone is lying.

Around 2:30 she says that if she has to come back and eat crow and say sorry she’ll do it.

The thing is, scripture doesn’t leave any room for real prophets to have prophetic oopsies. There is no room to simply say sorry, eat crow, and continue on being a real prophet.

“But the prophet who presumes to speak a word in my name that I have not commanded him to speak, or[f] who speaks in the name of other gods, that same prophet shall die.’ And if you say in your heart, ‘How may we know the word that the Lord has not spoken?’— when a prophet speaks in the name of the Lord, if the word does not come to pass or come true, that is a word that the Lord has not spoken; the prophet has spoken it presumptuously. You need not be afraid of him.”

— Duet. 18: 20-22

Vonda has reasons to be thankful. First, we’re not under the old covenant, so she can’t be put to death for her prophetic oopsies.

Also, she’s not living under a government controlled by hardcore Westminster Confession of Faith devotees. Under that scenario she could have a civil magistrate knocking on her door so she could be fitted for their favorite prophetic oopsie execution device.

There is still time for Vonda and people like her to call upon God to grant them repentance.

---

For those who think it's mean, judgmental and un-loving to criticize Vonda Brewer (or any other so-called prophet) here's something just for you: Shocking Stuff You're Not Supposed to Know.

If you're having a knee-jerk reaction to try and defend Vonda Brewer, check out: Confirmation Bias: Why You Are Protecting Your False Beliefs.

Finally, here's an article that will help you be more discerning and a lot less gullible: Defusing Demonic Dirty Bombs.

How to be a "Christian Psychic!"

This is NOT a satire piece:

"How to be a Christian Psychic"

Bill Johnson: "I've Never Seen Anything That Violent Before!"

Was Bill talking about a terrorist attack? A criminal assault caught on camera? An illegal dog fight?...

Nope. He's talking about his wife, Beni, and the violent convulsions she was thrown into at the Toronto Airport Revival.

Beni says, "For 20 to 25 minutes I shook violently, and my husband couldn't hold onto me-he had to let me go; and he says 'I have never seen anything that violent before' and he still hasn't seen anything that violent."

If that isn't weird and creepy enough, she then utters this amazing (and contradictory) sentence:

"I had absolutely no control over my body at all, but I knew it was God; I didn't know what it was." 

“I used to convict people of sin and lead them to repentance so they could have their sins forgiven, and I used to direct people’s attention towards Jesus… But now I just shake them around violently. That’s so much better!”

— Said The Holy Spirit Never

Please read more on this topic at the Berean Examiner

The Bill Johnson Cornucopia of False Teaching, Bible-Twisting and General Absurdity

Bill Johnson's Followers Imply: "He's Equivalent to Jesus" and "The Apostles Were Pharisees"

Since the article "Bethel Church Tells Witch She's On the Right Path…" came out, there's been a lot of comments made to Chris Rosebrough's Facebook page; most of the comments were supportive, but some were trying very hard to refute the article. The handful of arguments defending Bill Johnson and his church were pretty similar to each other and the article "Diffusing Demonic Dirty Bombs" covered most of them already, but a very interesting pattern emerged: The Bethel supporters (un-knowingly, to be sure) equated Bill Johnson with Jesus, and reduced the Apostles (the real Apostles in the Bible) to the role of unbelieving Pharisees. 

Bethel supporters claimed that "Pharisees" and "Religious Nuts" were responsible for criticizing that church; they are totally convinced that what goes on there is a genuine work of the Holy Spirit and that questioning anything there is the same as when the Pharisees questioned Jesus and refused to believe that He was the Son of God. Here's the GIGANTIC problem with that:

Bill Johnson is NOT Jesus, and therefore, being skeptical of his teachings is not the same as being a Pharisee! On top of that, Jesus and the Apostles tell us to "watch out for false teachers" and "test the spirits" and "watch your doctrine closely" but the Bill Johnson/Bethel supporters think that makes someone a Pharisee. So, in their own little confused world, they've made Bill Johnson equivalent to Jesus (we must not question him or his church-that would be blasphemy against the Holy Spirit!) and they've turned Jesus and the Apostles (who wrote the New Testament) into "Pharisees" and "Religious Nuts." 

Lastly, the other comment that was made multiple times was: "Oh, so now you're gonna believe a witch?!" This is the equivalent of saying "I don't want to believe this, so it isn't true." Otherwise you need to believe an incredible story that goes something like this:

"This girl, Annika, who pretends to be a former Christian but is now a (pretend?) witch, pretended to go to Bethel Church on several occasions so she could make up a story about it and then publish it on the Pagan channel of Patheos. She also brought along her friends who pretended to go there and then wrote about this pretend event. They also took photographs at Bethel Church, but those were all pretend photographs. This girl then pretended to get "prophetic words" so that she could blog about how encouraging those words were for her. She knew that eventually this would get published on a different website (half a year later), and that this would make Bethel Church look bad. She is very very very clever."  

Ultimately, the most important thing is to compare what is being taught at Bethel to God's Word-regardless of what Annika Mongen (or anyone else) has to say. 

“Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ.”

— Galatians 1:10

“But as for you, speak the things which are fitting for sound doctrine.”

— Titus 2:1

“But examine everything carefully; hold fast to that which is good...”

— 1 Thessalonians 5:21

“Hold fast (retain) the pattern of sound words (doctrine) which you have heard from me, in faith and love which are in Christ Jesus. Guard, through the Holy Spirit who dwells in us, the treasure which has been entrusted to you.”

— 2 Timothy 1: 13-14

The Bill Johnson Cornucopia of False Teaching, Bible-Twisting and General Absurdity

"Are you in needing of healing?"

That's the question Todd Bentley of FreshFireUSA ministries asked in his recent advert on FaceBook and Instagram.

Recently, "Bam Bam" Bentley advertised that you can buy his healing prayers so you can get miraculously healed. So if you want your kicked-in face to be healed, Todd's merchandise can heal you! Aren't you glad Todd Bentley can sell you his supernatural healing prayers on iTunes?

Bentley writes,

Are you in needing of healing? The voice of Healing anointed Healing prayers with song CD is available. We have receive Incredible testimonies of healing from our soaking healing CD. Get the Voice of Healing now available on iTunes! http://bit.ly/1gijMy6 and sample all other music by Todd Bentley on iTunes as well. Use the direct link above.

Proof_InstagramToddBentleySellsHealingPrayers_01-03-2015

From: https://instagram.com/p/zrWib5tFyZ/

So much for the free gifts of the Holy Spirit being free.

“The Spirit and the bride say, “Come!” And let the one who hears say, “Come!” Let the one who is thirsty come; and let the one who wishes take the free gift of the water of life.”

— Revelations 22:17